Everything Has A Season

Hello, friends. It’s been a while. Over two years a while, actually.

Just a smile to say “hi!”

I hope you all will understand. Not only have there been so many changes for the world, but everyone has been navigating the rocky storms of life on their own ships.

Same storm, own ships. Did I get that metaphor right? I think so. Let’s just leave it there.

The past two years were a whirlwind. My family moved again, my husband lost his job thanks to Covid, we had a new baby (girl!), my husband got a new job, our plans for schooling changed… the list goes on.

With all that change and adjustment, my writing fell to the wayside. Having four kids and homeschooling 2-3 of the four while husband travels for work is no joke. My mind wasn’t up for finding new words to sew together. My mind appreciated shutting down to mindless tasks of watching shows or reading books when I couldq.

Writing wasn’t happening. I started a few things, queried agents maybe once, but really- it was a season to put those dreams on the back burner. I took the time. I stepped away. I stopped pressuring myself and saying I HAD to keep going or my dreams of being published would never happen.

I needed the space.

Space is a good thing.

Maybe space feels scary or like the end of something, but I have found as I’ve gotten older that space is necessary. After all, if you can’t do things scared, then are you really challenging your paths of life?

Space might seem like you’re letting go of someone or something, but usually it is a wonderful way to find your footing. And you can get back on that path, or start a new one entirely.

I’m finding my way back to writing.

Or rather, I am finding my way to put my writing out into the world once more.

I’m visiting projects that I still love and can picture so clearly on a shelf.

I am facing a new season, a different footing, a different path.

I can’t wait to share what that looks like with you.

finding your voice

I am currently working on a project that has been a long time coming. For almost two years it’s been festering, just waiting for me to let it out. Slowly, the plot has  grown and the words are now finding their way on to the page.

The thing about new projects, though, is that you have to step back and take the time to find your voice in it all. The characters take on their own lives, with their own dialogue and hobbies and back story and everything. As the author, we mold it… but really it can take on a mind of its own.

Already the first five chapters of this project have changed three times. Three. And while I’m on the third round of trying to bring this thing to life, I’m already contemplating an entirely different route. It would change the story, changes pieces of the puzzle I’ve been literally holding in my hands for almost two years, and yet it’s calling me.

How do you find your voice when writing a story? How do you know which way is right, and which way is the road less traveled by that could be the way?

If you came here for answers, you really should move on. I don’t have them.

The answer to the question is you. Only you as the author can decide which way is the best way, and sometimes you have to explore so many different routes and options until you happen upon the best one.

Heck, the best way can sometimes be the way you didn’t want to go. You could be kicking and screaming the entire writing time and stumble upon so many blocks that you think you’ve lost your gift. This happened to me with my first finished novel. I didn’t want to stray from the truth, until I realized that the truth just wasn’t enough. It needed to be more. Slowly the fiction truly took over, and it continues to grow whenever I finish it.

Don’t be afraid to find your voice. Don’t be afraid to rewrite the book a completely different way because you have a new idea, or someone gave you a direction that you want to explore. This is art, after all. There is no “right” way.

There are only paths yet to be traveled on, and only you can decide which one will be the path that leads you to

The End.

making time in the new year

Happy 2019 all! How is yours starting out? I must admit mine has been a bit rocky, but I still have hope.

I have realized in the past few weeks of reflecting that my life has taken many twists and turns I didn’t expect it to when I began my writing journey. To be fair, I’ve been writing my whole life, but when I really considered myself an author– that’s when I count the beginning of my journey. And since then, so many things have changed. Within those changes- slowly but surely my writing has moved farther and farther back on the burners of life.

Now, I’m a writer. An author. Anyone who knows that feeling of an attachment to the written word like it’s your left arm knows that it doesn’t just go away.

But sometimes other things become more important. Raising babies. Relationships. Moves. Other careers. Getting well.

We enter seasons of life that don’t always allow our left arm to be as important as our right. It’s a scary feeling, and many times I have denied it. The truth is, though: it’s okay.

It’s okay because I’m still writing. I’m still working on things and jotting down ideas and making time in my schedule to sit down and write. Those times might not be hours upon hours like the days where I only had one child, or no children for that matter. It might not be a drive to be traditionally published quite as strong as it was three-and-a-half years ago before I signed with my first agent. But that’s okay.

I have written earnestly before about making time to be a writer, but what about the seasons of life where we truly cannot find that time? I know, I know. I’m eating my own words. Before I said something along the lines of: if you’re a writer, you make/find the time. And I still believe that. But I also know there are those of us that want to make that time, and maybe even have that time– and then we make the choice to say “not right now” and watch a movie with a friend instead, or sit and read another author’s book.

My goal is to take as many little moments this year and put them toward my writing. However, I also want to give myself grace and know that even if I chose other things first-

I’m still a writer.

why i read (and write) YA as an adult

DSC_0341The YA community, as readers and writers, consists of a wide range of people. Sometimes adults who are within the community are given a hard time. While this is diminishing (as far as I have seen), it is still there. Admittedly, I am even sometimes hesitant to go into the YA section in bookstores because I’m weary of being judged. (Ridiculous, I know.)

I was pondering YA a lot the other day. Truth be told, I’ve been in a big slump (which is why you haven’t heard from me) with reading and writing. It wasn’t until I read SMOKE IN THE SUN that I was reminded again just why I love YA so much.

When you’re an adult, it’s very easy to lose sight of hope and adventure. Maybe not always, and maybe I’m setting myself up to get a slew of comments on this. I think, for most adults, even if you are working your dream job and have everything you ever could have hoped for when younger– it’s still easy to get caught up in the every day “adulting” and lose a bit of yourself.

Yes, we grow and we learn and mature and all that truly good stuff.

But I think there’s always a piece of us that should stay, well, young.

I love YA for the hope. For the young adults facing problems so much bigger than themselves and conquering them. Maybe it’s not normal to see a seventeen year old save the kingdom/world… but some teenagers save their family every.single.day. It’s amazing to see a fourteen-year-old face problems that seem so far fetched, but when held to the “real life” scenarios some face, they’re nothing.

That’s hope. It’s hope that these everyday problems are conquerable, solvable, achievable. It’s hope that young adults in real life have the ability to do extraordinary things because these characters show them that it’s not impossible. It’s the hope of chasing dreams, love, life, adventures, jobs and the reality that it is scary, and that’s okay. It’s the hope that they can believe in themselves and not back down from challenges, but face them.

 

Hope is what makes me go back to reading it. Not because I can’t handle adult books, or because adult fiction is too boring or hard to read. And it’s not because I don’t think I could write adult fiction, either, because I imagine I could if I really put my mind to… and there’s part of me that hopes I can write at least one in my lifetime.

Goodness, though, that hope is so strong. It’s motivational, to see characters and write characters in a time or place or event that is outside of my own with that motivation and determination that we can sometimes lose. They don’t settle.

I’m not saying I’ve settled, and I’m not saying that I’ve lost hope. I’m saying that in this world we are a part of, there are things each and every day that can suck the life and hope out of a person. And, to me, YA counteracts it.

Hope.

True, undeniable, tangible hope.

That’s what I love about YA.

 

Do you read and/or write YA? I’d love to hear from you on this!

 

smoke in the sun by renee ahdieh, a review

34818921_656760461337893_6792604178645516288_n-1SMOKE IN THE SUN by Renee Ahdieh had a book birthday on June 5th! To tell you I was waiting on this sequel with so much anticipation would not do it justice. Almost exactly a year ago I did a review on the first book in this duology, FLAME IN THE MIST.

Here’s what Goodreads has to say:

After Okami is captured in the Jukai forest, Mariko has no choice—to rescue him, she must return to Inako and face the dangers that have been waiting for her in the Heian Castle. She tricks her brother, Kenshin, and betrothed, Raiden, into thinking she was being held by the Black Clan against her will, playing the part of the dutiful bride-to-be to infiltrate the emperor’s ranks and uncover the truth behind the betrayal that almost left her dead.

With the wedding plans already underway, Mariko pretends to be consumed with her upcoming nuptials, all the while using her royal standing to peel back the layers of lies and deception surrounding the imperial court. But each secret she unfurls gives way to the next, ensnaring Mariko and Okami in a political scheme that threatens their honor, their love and very the safety of the empire

This sequel did not disappoint. I was so excited when Amazon accidentally? sent this to me a few days early so I got a head start on reading it. I had missed spending time with Mariko and Okami, and this book brought me right back into their beautiful word.

I enjoyed getting to know new characters, but much like with the The Wrath & The Dawn duology, I was every-so-slightly disappointed that I didn’t get to know these characters as deeply as the others. At times the book felt a little rushed, and a little unfinished, with the additions. However, I was very, very thankful for the epilogue- because without it I’m not sure I would have loved this book as much as the first. Just being honest, here!

Needless to say, overall, I am waiting to see what Renee Ahdieh has next. I am a huge fan.

If you’re in the Phoenix area, Renee will be in Tempe next Wednesday! I personally can’t wait to go. This will be my first reading/book signing- can you believe it? If you’re there, please make sure to say hi (if you like, of course)!

read across america week

28279245_598121117201828_7012762352416247332_nIt’s READ ACROSS AMERICA WEEK!

Or, at least, I’m making it such in my household. I know Friday (March 2nd) is the official Read Across America DAY. Why? Because that’s Dr. Seuss’ birthday, of course!

Dr. Seuss has always been my go-to for inspiration. Not because his words always ring true (even though they do) or because he’s a favorite (which he is)- but because he persevered as an author.

There are many authors out there who did. J.K. Rowling. Kathryn Stockett. John Grisham. They don’t even skim the surface. But Seuss was one of the first statistics I ever heard that I clung to. He was rejected 27 times. 27. Originally I heard 52, but these days if you google it, it says 27.

STILL.

DR. SEUSS.

THE Dr. Seuss was rejected twenty-seven times before someone finally decided to get his genius out there. Can you imagine having that on your gravestone?

“Here lies John Smith, he rejected Dr. Seuss”

No thanks.

But this week isn’t just about Dr. Seuss. It’s about the importance of reading. My last post was about how books can change and grow with you, and maybe the meaning changes when you re-read them as an adult or as you get older in general.

This is why it is so important to start reading young. Reading to your kids, your friends’ kids, heck- volunteering to visit a classroom or library and read. Kids aren’t going to develop a love of the written word if they are never truly introduced. They will never experience that amazing feeling of being transported into another world, another life- no matter how temporary.

If for some reason you haven’t picked up a book in a while, use this as an excuse to start reading again. Go. NOW. Stop reading this post and pick up a book that you’ve wanted to read but “just haven’t gotten to” and start now.

Reading is so important, even if you’re not a writer. Reading helps you have a longer attention span, it helps you learn, it helps your imagination continue to grow. Reading is amazing.

And if you say you don’t have time to read, tell me you haven’t binge-watched a Netflix show or watched a movie in the last week, month, months. It’s not the same, I get it. Sometimes you need TV to take your mind off things and not have to “work for it.” But… all the time?

I’ll just leave it there so I don’t get some hateful comments or anything. In all seriousness, though, go read! Even if you just pick up your favorite Dr. Seuss book this Friday– that’s still something.

Happy 114th birthday, Dr. Seuss. Your words will forever be timeless.

 

reading books then & now

31527F6E-4D80-4417-B79C-38E6F7F51364There aren’t enough days in the years to read all the books that I wish I could. To enjoy them and then read them again, and again, and again to absorb them. So many books, so little time.

I recently was rereading A LANTERN IN HER HAND by Bess Streeter Aldrich. An older book, I read it when I was a teenager and it didn’t really stick with me. Reading it now, though, as a mother of three- it stuck.

This is the way with books, I think. As we grow and learn and live, they change with us. Whether they are more or less applicable depends, but the pieces of your soul which they stick to can shift. It’s a beautiful, wondrous thing.

But I wonder, if because there are so many books and so little time, if we all take the time we do have to do this with the books that matter. To reread them, learn from them, understand them better. If we are only reading the new, new, new… if we only read books that are meant for younger readers when we are older or older readers when we are younger, are we benefitting from all the reading?

Yes, I would say. Don’t worry.

We always benefit from reading, but I think if we took more time we could benefit even more. Books help us through things, remind us of others, and help us escape. Every book has a different purpose.

If I hadn’t reread A LANTERN IN HER HAND, I would have missed the heartache of Abbie Deal. When I was younger I was more distracted by the idea of her not chasing her dreams and the fact that the book was very wordy and descriptive (less dialogue). Now, though, I understand and appreciate her sacrifice more than can be explained.

Rereading the HARRY POTTER books, for instance, or THE CHRONICLES OF NARNIA, with my oldest son- I am picking up on things that I have missed. (This is moreso with THE CHRONICLES OF NARNIA, because I’ve reread HARRY POTTER far too many times.) But each time, the books change for the good and the bad.

I think this proves the (subjective) quality of books. If they stand the test of time, change and yet mean something extraordinary to the reader, they are well worth the time to reread.

What do you think? Do you have any books you have reread that changed with time, or ones you hope/plan to reread?

agent odds are (not) in your favor

It’s a new year full of new goals. These are typically made up of word counts, edits, queries, deadlines, and the dream of book deals (at least for me).

In an industry where the odds don’t seem in our favor, it might be time to admit the truth: they aren’t.

May-the-odds-be-ever-in-your-favor

Sarah La Polla of Bradford Literary Agency wrote an end-of-year post where she shared her query stats. While this is different for every agent, it really puts numbers out there for (us) writers.

You can read her original post here, but in the end it came down to her receiving almost 4,000 queries in 2017. (And she was closed to queries for the summer!)

Let’s think about that number.

4,000.

Now, I’m not a true statistics person. I wish I could pull out how many queries writers send out on average, how many rejections writers get, and so forth. But in the end, it doesn’t work that way because this business is so subjective. (That’s what I’m telling myself so I don’t have to think much past the number above emboldened… and so I don’t even have to attempt any math.) One writer might get 100 rejections while another gets an agent their first time up to bat.

But the truth is, there are a lot more writers than there are agents- and we all want to volunteer as tribute.

tumblr_m1kn4vbKV11qbpbbro1_500

It can get discouraging to keep pushing on, project after project and/or query after query, in hopes of securing the agent of our dreams. And even then, if we are blessed with an agent, we have to go through the process all over again with editors/publishers. It’s never ending. And that agent might not be the one. You might have to go through the process with another agent before going through it with an editor or publisher. And the cycle continues!

So, why do we do it?

I can’t answer that question for you. I really can’t.

For me, it’s the desire I’ve had since I was about six-years-old to have my books on shelves at your nearest bookstore. To share the stories that I have embedded in my soul and are begging to get out into the world.

It’s because that no matter the ruts, no matter the breaks, no matter what life throws at me- I’m always craving words. Words, words, and more words.

I don’t show you the post from Sarah to depress you, but rather to encourage. The odds might not be in your favor, but know that if you keep working and pushing and dreaming and diving- you can be the exception to the rule.

You can be the one-in-four-thousand. 

Say it out loud. Be at peace with it.

The odds are not in your favor.

That way, when that agent and/or publisher comes calling- you’ll be even more proud.

kvXq8

 

 

give thanks for your writing

In a competitive business where everyone is hoping to make a break, it’s hard sometimes to be thankful for the season you’re in.

You might just be starting out with your novel (it is NaNoWriMo after all). You might be querying, starting with your new agent, on you third agent, about to score that deal, releasing your fifth book– who knows!

The thing is, the publishing industry is a crazy, scary, beautiful place. If we didn’t know that, we wouldn’t be writers… but sometimes it’s easy to forget it.

This is just a small reminder to give yourself a pat on the back, and it’s as much for me as it is for you, reader. Remind yourself that you’re amazing because you’ve actually put words to paper. You are one step ahead of those that “want to find time” or “always wanted to write.” And if you are one of those later people that I’ve mentioned, there is never a better time than now to start.

Yes, now. I mean, maybe finish reading this…but then get your butt off here and start writing your own words.

There are never going to be perfect conditions. Maybe you think you need to work for a while so you have the time to really focus on your writing after, or maybe you want to build your family roots before you write that best seller– but if you put off writing over and over and over again… eventually you’ll miss it.

Set your mind to it. Write. Even if you can’t come up with that amazing idea, just start writing something, anything.

Anything is better than nothing.

Give thanks, writer. You are in a beautiful season- even if you don’t think you are. There’s always something beautiful to find…and something beautiful to write.

[writing] dry spells can be natural

IMG_4877If I’m being honest, I am amazed by writers who write every day. I’m amazed by writers who can sit down and hash out a novel in one month. I’m amazed by writers who plot and plan and schedule and stick to it. I’m amazed by writers, period.

But there comes a time in every writer’s life, at least I believe this to be true, that they can’t do any of it. They sit to write and instead end up on Twitter for hours. They schedule writing time and instead settle down with a good book (or a binge-worthy Netflix show). They plot out a novel for the perfect month and then they have something come up that soaks up the time they had for writing, making them unable.

Life happens. And sometimes, no matter how hard you try, writing doesn’t happen.

I am in a season of life where writing is very difficult. Not because I don’t make time to write, or because I don’t have a WIP ready for my attention- but because I’m so mentally wiped that even in my scheduled time, my brain is fried. If you’ve been where I am before, or you’re in the trenches of a hard-to-write-season with me- never fear. I have heard there’s light at the end of it, and whether this season lasts for a day, month, or years- here are a few uplifting things to remember.

It won’t last forever.

You are a writer, an author. You have written before and you will write again. Because if you are a true writer, the words of your stories and the stories of others make up your core in a way that you can never escape them. This season of life might be hard, and the well of creativity might run dry at the end of the day. Whether it’s because you are chasing little kids around day in and day out, or you’re starting a new job, or you’re going through some health issues, or someone you love has health issues– there could be so many reasons I can’t even continue, but whatever it is- know that it’s normal.

Don’t be hard on yourself.

As a writer, it’s hard not to see the success rate of others and play the comparison game. Whatever “success” looks like to you, remember that you are succeeding. Your life experiences, even the dry spells, contribute to your writing fuel. Some day you’ll sit down and remember what it was like to have no words, and spit out thousands onto a new page. Celebrate that you’re reading a book, or gaining experiences for a story, or blogging to keep those words flowing (woot woot). Don’t be hard on yourself. Celebrate yourself, because you need it now more than ever.

Just keep going.

Push through the season.

More than that, enjoy it. Enjoy this season of life- even if it sucks.

You might be craving the feeling of your fingertips brushing keyboard keys in a way that makes your head spin because the words are coming faster than your fingers can type. You might be reading someone else book and feeling as though you can do that, and start feeling low because you haven’t done it in a long time. You might be mad at this season because all you want to do is sit down and write and you feel a little robbed of your passion because it is who you are.

All of these things are normal, my friends.

Every writer who is a true writer will not walk away from it. You will come back for more, and the world will be waiting for your masterpieces.